Well, I wasn't sure how I'd make it through Mother's Day this year, but I'd say its a pretty good sign that I'm writing this post. I dreaded this past weekend all last week...poor Rich! But I have to say it was a wonderful weekend.
Rich and the kids all got me cards and gift certificates for a manicure and pedicure. I even got two Mother's Day cards all the way from the Little Angel Orphanage in Shanghai, China. They were from Olivia! Funny how there was no postage on the envelope and baby Olivia can write full sentences already. Rich explained that the orphanage allows the children to send mail for free to their mommies on Mother's Day, and we all decided that she must be in an orphanage for the gifted and talented since she is writing before her first birthday!!! I also thought it was interesting how Olivia and Tiffany have similar writing and they haven't even met yet. Hmmmm??? Nevertheless, I felt closer to Olivia than I have ever felt. She is with all of us in our hearts. Thanks guys!
We took my mom to breakfast on Sunday. When I called her in the morning she said, "Oh, hi hun". It was beautiful to hear her say those words! For a long time she didn't refer to me as anyone and now she was saying the words that she had always said when I would call pre-Alzheimer's. Maybe it was Mother's Day that sparked her memory. After breakfast we took a walk around her property and picked my Grandmother's lilacs, daffodils and bleeding hearts to make a splendid bouquet. I made sure to talk with my mom about my "Nana up on the hill" and how much she loved her flowers! My mother kept looking at them and saying, "They are so pretty". She was my ray of sunshine on Mother's Day!
Later in the day, we met Rich's mom and dad for dinner. My mother in -law is is such a strong and giving woman, and I thank God everyday for the wisdom she shares. Rich and I are very lucky to have her in our lives. (Dad, Father's Day is on its way!) It was a great ending to a great weekend. Thanks guys for being our rock. We love you.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Mom's Birthday
Happy Birthday, Mom!!! Yesterday was my mom's 70th birthday. We had her and my dad over for dinner and cake on Sunday. Dad was pleasant as pie and mom was as sweet as can be. For those who don't know, my mom has Alzheimer's. She is in the mid to upper stages of this heartbreaking disease. Although she suffers very little (which is a good thing), it is very sad and trying for those around her. My mom was adopted and I truly believe we are carrying on her legacy through the adoption of baby Olivia. My mom's condition makes the wait for our baby even more difficult as we want so much for my mom to understand who Olivia is and why she is here. I've learned that grandchildren light up the eyes of their grandparents, especially those with forms of dementia. So, we hope and pray she will be here in time to light up my mother's beautiful blue eyes. I know it will happen...God will see to it.
My mom's lucky number has always been seven (probably because my brother and I were born in the 7th month). Well, she just turned 70, this is the year 2007, and there is a really good chance that our referral will arrive in July....and a lot of babies currently being referred are around 7 months of age. That would be incredible, huh?
Pray first, but think 7!!!
My mom's lucky number has always been seven (probably because my brother and I were born in the 7th month). Well, she just turned 70, this is the year 2007, and there is a really good chance that our referral will arrive in July....and a lot of babies currently being referred are around 7 months of age. That would be incredible, huh?
Pray first, but think 7!!!
Another Wonderful Adventure into Chinatown...
Yes, we pounded the pavement in Chinatown again, and sooooooo glad we did! After going to Federal Plaza with Mom and Dad Davis (so glad to help with Mom's green card renewal!), we all made our way over to the Jing Fong restaurant. Things were a little different this time as it was not an organized event, but we learned a lot about authentic Chinese dining. They had a lunch special call Dim Sum. The waitresses brought carts to tables and guests could choose from a variety of appetizers... we weren't quite sure of the ingredients, but we braved it out anyway! Unbelievably delicious! It was Chinese food in a whole new way...a very authentic way! We will be experts by the time baby Olivia is here. We ordered a couple of entrees to share, ate them, and didn't even realize we received another table's entree until the waiter explained. What an experience, but well worth it!!!
After lunch, we strolled through town. We found a little authentic Chinese market and bought wasabi peas ( a favorite of ours) along with some green tea. Rich hasn't stopped drinking the tea since we arrived home. His system is certainly overflowing with antioxidants! And Mom's face was priceless when she took her first taste of a wasabi pea (these in particular were very high in the horseradish department!).
What a great trip! We can't wait to visit again, and lets hope baby Olivia will be there with us. Soon, baby, soon!
Arrival update:
The wait currently stands at 16.6 months. If it remains the same, she will be with our family by the end of June, but if the time continues to creep up exponentially, then we are looking at August or September. Lets keep the faith and pray that she is in our arms as soon as possible, and as soon as God sees fit!
After lunch, we strolled through town. We found a little authentic Chinese market and bought wasabi peas ( a favorite of ours) along with some green tea. Rich hasn't stopped drinking the tea since we arrived home. His system is certainly overflowing with antioxidants! And Mom's face was priceless when she took her first taste of a wasabi pea (these in particular were very high in the horseradish department!).
What a great trip! We can't wait to visit again, and lets hope baby Olivia will be there with us. Soon, baby, soon!
Arrival update:
The wait currently stands at 16.6 months. If it remains the same, she will be with our family by the end of June, but if the time continues to creep up exponentially, then we are looking at August or September. Lets keep the faith and pray that she is in our arms as soon as possible, and as soon as God sees fit!
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Making connections with others seems to help with the wait...
I took the following post (below in quotes) from another waiting mom's website since I couldn't say it better myself. For the longest time I thought about how this long wait is very similar to the stages of death, and was surprised to see that someone else viewed it in the same way. Please don't be sad because of this posting...the stage where I reside now is somewhere just before the last stage. I am letting go and beginning to realize I have no control over this. The reality is that we are closer than we have ever been!
Here is her posting...Rich and I understand it one hundred percent!
"I believe that I have experienced each stage of grief, in order, in varying degree and duration. I've certainly seen them all expressed by others in the many online groups to which I belong.The 5 stages (and my interpretation of each) are:
1. denial --"there's no way this can be happening, I refuse to believe that we will not have our referral within 6-9 mos as I was promised by my agency, the referral times will certainly speed up, these changes are merely temporary and will have little affect on us in the long run", etc.--I saw a lot of this on the boards for the first few months of the slow down. There were some people who absolutely refused to believe that wait times were lengthening, exponentially. Some on the Yahoo groups became literally incensed if anyone dared to express a belief that we, with 2/06 LID's, would not be home with our children by Halloween, and later Christmas, 2006.It was as if they believed that the mere recognition of the fact that wait times were increasing would somehow cause a longer wait.--personally, I tend to be a pragmatist, and somewhat negative and cynical by nature. I didn't live in the land of denial long at all.
2. anger --"this is ridiculous, how can CCAA be doing this to us, someone must be to blame, my agency intentionally misled me", etc.--during this next stage I read of people even considering lawsuits against their agencies. I was angry for a while, not at anyone in particular, just generally angry.
3. bargaining (pleading) --"surely there will be a change soon, these drastic extensions in the referral process cannot go on forever, this will be the month they will speed up, the wait is due to the bird flu, the Hunan scandal, CCAA moving offices", etc.--I spent a little time here, pleading with the process, imagining how things could be different.
4. depression --this one is rather self explanatory. I've tried very hard not to get depressed but it creeps in. I've spent quite a bit of time being intermittently sad and frustrated. Sometimes it really hit me. The waiting, at times, felt so empty and even hopeless, it was actually physically painful. I think you actually would have to be in the process to truly understand this emotion. I miss and long for a person I havent' met yet. It's weird. I felt pretty sorry for myself and continually lamented the fact that we hadn't begun the process sooner.
And now, I enter.....5. acceptance --TA DA!!! "it will happen when it happens, I will get my baby when the time is right, there is nothing I can do to speed this process--I can only control my feelings and reactions/response to the process", etc.--Here I am. It's official, I have accepted that I have absolutely no control over these circumstances. I recognize the process for what it is. I no longer feel that sense of anger with the fact that the world isn't fair. I don't harbor any false hope that there will be some divine or other intervention that will magicly speed the process and I haven't shed a tear in quite awhile.OK, I've arrived. Now what?"
Here is her posting...Rich and I understand it one hundred percent!
"I believe that I have experienced each stage of grief, in order, in varying degree and duration. I've certainly seen them all expressed by others in the many online groups to which I belong.The 5 stages (and my interpretation of each) are:
1. denial --"there's no way this can be happening, I refuse to believe that we will not have our referral within 6-9 mos as I was promised by my agency, the referral times will certainly speed up, these changes are merely temporary and will have little affect on us in the long run", etc.--I saw a lot of this on the boards for the first few months of the slow down. There were some people who absolutely refused to believe that wait times were lengthening, exponentially. Some on the Yahoo groups became literally incensed if anyone dared to express a belief that we, with 2/06 LID's, would not be home with our children by Halloween, and later Christmas, 2006.It was as if they believed that the mere recognition of the fact that wait times were increasing would somehow cause a longer wait.--personally, I tend to be a pragmatist, and somewhat negative and cynical by nature. I didn't live in the land of denial long at all.
2. anger --"this is ridiculous, how can CCAA be doing this to us, someone must be to blame, my agency intentionally misled me", etc.--during this next stage I read of people even considering lawsuits against their agencies. I was angry for a while, not at anyone in particular, just generally angry.
3. bargaining (pleading) --"surely there will be a change soon, these drastic extensions in the referral process cannot go on forever, this will be the month they will speed up, the wait is due to the bird flu, the Hunan scandal, CCAA moving offices", etc.--I spent a little time here, pleading with the process, imagining how things could be different.
4. depression --this one is rather self explanatory. I've tried very hard not to get depressed but it creeps in. I've spent quite a bit of time being intermittently sad and frustrated. Sometimes it really hit me. The waiting, at times, felt so empty and even hopeless, it was actually physically painful. I think you actually would have to be in the process to truly understand this emotion. I miss and long for a person I havent' met yet. It's weird. I felt pretty sorry for myself and continually lamented the fact that we hadn't begun the process sooner.
And now, I enter.....5. acceptance --TA DA!!! "it will happen when it happens, I will get my baby when the time is right, there is nothing I can do to speed this process--I can only control my feelings and reactions/response to the process", etc.--Here I am. It's official, I have accepted that I have absolutely no control over these circumstances. I recognize the process for what it is. I no longer feel that sense of anger with the fact that the world isn't fair. I don't harbor any false hope that there will be some divine or other intervention that will magicly speed the process and I haven't shed a tear in quite awhile.OK, I've arrived. Now what?"
Monday, February 26, 2007
Adventure into Chinatown
Ok, we realize that we weren't in Shanghai, but we are pretty sure we got a little taste of it. I had to keep reminding myself..."Kim, we came here by train not on a plane, and we can't take any of these babies home with us today". Lol! The Jing Fong restaurant was fantastic. The food and show truly brought us closer to Chinese culture. It is so much fun to learn about our daughter's birth country, and it certainly seems to help with the wait. This is the year of the pig, which by Chinese belief, signifies luck to babies born within it. Cheers, to my friends giving birth this year!
Our agency kindly sat us with other couples who are also patiently waiting for their daughters. One couple is just beginning the long wait, which is now approximately 2 years! It sure made our 16-18 month wait not seem so bad. One waiting mom was particularly kind to Tyler and Corey. She talked to them a lot about school and their soon to be baby sister. She really made them feel comfortable and included. Along with their big sis, Tiffany, they are going to be great siblings!
It was a wonderful day, in fact we are heading back next month with Rich's mom and dad. Mom is in need of renewing her green card. She remains a citizen of Ireland as most of her family still resides there. It is home to her and she will often visit for 2-3 months at a time. Well, it just so happens that Federal Plaza (location of green card renewal) is right next door to Chinatown. We are going to bring them to the Jing Fong. Can't wait! Speaking of not being able to wait, grandma and grandpa Davis are worse than us the during this waiting process. They want so much to hold their granddaughter. It will happen! It really will!
Tiffany and Jeremiah...we'll get you there too! So sorry you missed the first trip, but we promise there will a lot fun trips for you to join us and your baby sister.
Our agency kindly sat us with other couples who are also patiently waiting for their daughters. One couple is just beginning the long wait, which is now approximately 2 years! It sure made our 16-18 month wait not seem so bad. One waiting mom was particularly kind to Tyler and Corey. She talked to them a lot about school and their soon to be baby sister. She really made them feel comfortable and included. Along with their big sis, Tiffany, they are going to be great siblings!
It was a wonderful day, in fact we are heading back next month with Rich's mom and dad. Mom is in need of renewing her green card. She remains a citizen of Ireland as most of her family still resides there. It is home to her and she will often visit for 2-3 months at a time. Well, it just so happens that Federal Plaza (location of green card renewal) is right next door to Chinatown. We are going to bring them to the Jing Fong. Can't wait! Speaking of not being able to wait, grandma and grandpa Davis are worse than us the during this waiting process. They want so much to hold their granddaughter. It will happen! It really will!
Tiffany and Jeremiah...we'll get you there too! So sorry you missed the first trip, but we promise there will a lot fun trips for you to join us and your baby sister.
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Happy New Year!
We are heading to Chinatown today to celebrate the Chinese New Year. Our adoption agency invited us to a celebration at the Jing Fong restaurant. Last year at this time we truly believed baby Olivia would be here to experience this with us and we can't even begin to tell you how much we wish she could be here. But we believe she is here in spirit, and in a sense, being in Chinatown might make us feel a little closer to her. We must get ready now as the train heads out of Poughkeepsie at 9:33. We'll tell you all about it when we return, and hopefully add some pics to this site!
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
While we wait...
Dearest Family and Friends,
Well, here it is...finally a place where friends and family may visit to find out how the adoption of baby Olivia is moving along. We must say that it is moving at a snail's pace, but we are hanging in there. On December 20, 2005 we were approved by China to adopt a healthy baby girl between 7 and 14 months of age. At the time we expected a 6-7 month wait, but a lot happened in the meantime. China experienced a large number of international applicants and baby trafficking issues arose (closing down one of it's larger orphanages), thus creating a massive backlog. Our wait time has increased to 15-16 months since the 12/20/05 approval. We are currently looking at a June 2007 referral (pictures and info), although Rich has high hopes for late April. We would travel 4-6 weeks thereafter and spend 2 weeks in China with our baby daughter before bringing here home.
On February 2, 2007 families up through October 13, 2005 have received their referrals. December's families (ours) are not too far behind, therefore we try to remain very optimistic. Mother's Day would be a beautiful thing, but Father's Day is more realistic and just as wonderful! The wait is very difficult, but we truly believe it is all part of God's plan.
And thank all of you for your kind words and reassurance during this very long wait!
Well, here it is...finally a place where friends and family may visit to find out how the adoption of baby Olivia is moving along. We must say that it is moving at a snail's pace, but we are hanging in there. On December 20, 2005 we were approved by China to adopt a healthy baby girl between 7 and 14 months of age. At the time we expected a 6-7 month wait, but a lot happened in the meantime. China experienced a large number of international applicants and baby trafficking issues arose (closing down one of it's larger orphanages), thus creating a massive backlog. Our wait time has increased to 15-16 months since the 12/20/05 approval. We are currently looking at a June 2007 referral (pictures and info), although Rich has high hopes for late April. We would travel 4-6 weeks thereafter and spend 2 weeks in China with our baby daughter before bringing here home.
On February 2, 2007 families up through October 13, 2005 have received their referrals. December's families (ours) are not too far behind, therefore we try to remain very optimistic. Mother's Day would be a beautiful thing, but Father's Day is more realistic and just as wonderful! The wait is very difficult, but we truly believe it is all part of God's plan.
And thank all of you for your kind words and reassurance during this very long wait!
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